Carradale

[ChrisA]

No, without doubt there is more than one of these 'Cheeky Monkeys'.

I found a good way to relieve the stress of continual ridicule from the bochan and turkey was to visit this site and let them have it!


http://christmas.calmasylum.com/calm/01day.php

Thank you. I needed that. In fact, that's the best post on here. Ever.

[bubbly jock]

( Sigas siendo siempre el pavo salvaje- no dejes que te enfade)

Thank you Dorian

Jeest practicing in case I have to make a quick getaway.

I know I'm a wile bird but I am trying to mend my ways. I am very easy led.

bubbly

[dgraves]

Anytime, Bubbly- Its fun, especially when someone knows the language
Guys, the wild turkey has many hidden talents.

[LO]

Jeengs, ist that LO in the middle wae hees rid shirt oan,

To be fair Pops, I had misplaced my glasses again and thought I was in the queue for the butchers. Then they started passing round this bag with Lego in it and before I knew what was happening this sinister looking bloke was out with a Box Brownie. Got away as quick as I could but had a hell of a job explaining why there was a lovely model of a helicopter on the table and no mince in the pot.........

[Bochan Mor]

Jeengs, ist that LO in the middle wae hees rid shirt oan,

To be fair Pops, I had misplaced my glasses again and thought I was in the queue for the butchers. Then they started passing round this bag with Lego in it and before I knew what was happening this sinister looking bloke was out with a Box Brownie. Got away as quick as I could but had a hell of a job explaining why there was a lovely model of a helicopter on the table and no mince in the pot.........

There you are now, we learn something every day. Not only does LO talk a full pun of the butcher's finest, at times he also eats it as well. I'm sure I was in the butchers one day, and overheard him asking the long suffering flesher for a pun of his most exquisite shoulder steak. When the harassed butcher was about to wrap it up in the wafer-thin poly bag, the bold LO pronounced: 'Aye that's fine. Now if you'd just like to pass it through your splendid alloy mincer........................Now mind, Twice!' No thought for the 10 pensioners and 3 orphans waiting patiently in the queue wae their ration books and dummies tae hand.

I know fine that it didn't taste anything like 'Wee Scoom’s' organic produce used to, but what the hell. Certainly it would taste a damn site better than the watered down mulch being marketed as top notch by the supermarkets.

I better watch that I'm not using names and words that the 'Midnight Cowboys’ don't understand or relate to. The computer man will likely take a fanniach and the other fella could finish us all off with a paloory or a braxy.

Oor ain Morenish will likely sort them out though. They’d naw be the first that he'd coped ower onto their backs and rested his tackety boots on their diaphragms till their pulse slowed right doon to a snail's pace. If they’re really unlucky they might get the shears up the flanks and back, then way over their heads. Mind you, maybe they've really gone this time! Has anyone got any news from Manchester, so that we can make them feel a little bit more at home?

As for you Sanyanya, you can remain in the doldrums for now, naw doubt bubbly will deal with you at a later date.

Looks like two of the villagers are going to carry on their competion to see which one of them can be the most prolific poster of photos on the whole of the WWW.

[ChrisA]

Oor ain Morenish will likely sort them out though. They’d naw be the first that he'd coped ower onto their backs and rested his tackety boots on their diaphragms till their pulse slowed right doon to a snail's pace.

Can I just say that such veiled threats of violence do nothing for either this board or the decent people of Kintyre.

Remind me to offer you such a welcome next time you come to Manchester eh?

[morenish]

now remember bochan the english outnumber us 11.sumthin tae wan!
which is no nearly enough to work up a sweat on a cold december day, as for clippin them ther'es jeest nae money int the now.
but i have heard a wheesper o a good market for ears, oot in the far east, so maybe i better sherpen up the shears richt enough

[witchnettle]

can anyone help me? I am looking for some hazel to make a thumb stick out of , does anyone know of a suitable tree round about these parts?
x

[Sanyanya]

can anyone help me? I am looking for some hazel to make a thumb stick out of , does anyone know of a suitable tree round about these parts?
x

If you walk from Kennacraig to Carradale, you will pass a small, not so thicket of hazels above Sunadale. Good for a modest hat-full around late September.

Try not to cause too much damage to the trees, as I don't know where else to gather fresh hazels in Kintyre.

[Bobbie En Tejas]

can anyone help me? I am looking for some hazel to make a thumb stick out of , does anyone know of a suitable tree round about these parts?
x

In folklore, a hazel rod protected against evil spirits. You might want to drop a little here as you walk on by, witch

[Sanyanya]

can anyone help me? I am looking for some hazel to make a thumb stick out of , does anyone know of a suitable tree round about these parts?
x

In folklore, a hazel rod protected against evil spirits. You might want to drop a little here as you walk on by, witch

Perhaps Bochan Mor should invest in one of these sticks before he makes his next trip down South to Manchester. I have a feeling that he may receive a warmer welcome than usual.

[Right Pongal]

No, without doubt there is more than one of these 'Cheeky Monkeys'.

I found a good way to relieve the stress of continual ridicule from the bochan and turkey was to visit this site and let them have it!


http://christmas.calmasylum.com/calm/01day.php

Thank you. I needed that. In fact, that's the best post on here. Ever.

See these damned turkeys; jeest when you think that your getting the better of the brutes, they come back all the harder at you. I managed to get to over 3000, but then I didn't have the chance to look at the scoreboard after that.

When the first bugath pulled the gun on me, I thought what the heck's going on here. Before I knew it, I was surrounded by the pistol packin mamas and I bit the dust.

I don't know if I liked the moral of this game: 'No matter who hard you try, the turkey always wins!'

Not in my back yerd....... they tend to make a hell of a mess with their grain!

[Bochan Mor]

now remember bochan the english outnumber us 11.sumthin tae wan!
which is no nearly enough to work up a sweat on a cold december day, as for clippin them ther'es jeest nae money int the now.
but i have heard a wheesper o a good market for ears, oot in the far east, so maybe i better sherpen up the shears richt enough

I don't think this makes them any better than us Morenish, just more prolific.

If they were half as good at inventing things as the Scottish, then they'd have something to craw aboot and the world would be a much better place!

[GarySutherland]

How about the World Wide Web, without which none of us would be where we are right now, if you see what I mean.

'Invented' by Tim Berners-Lee, a London-born Englishman working at the time (1980) as a contractor for Cern.

Cheers
Gary

[Bobbie En Tejas]

How about the World Wide Web, without which none of us would be where we are right now, if you see what I mean.

'Invented' by Tim Berners-Lee, a London-born Englishman working at the time (1980) as a contractor for Cern.

Cheers
Gary

So Al Gore was going by a pseudonym then? and pretending he was English to boot! Very clever