Carradale

[Sweltered]

Aye, she's been around the village now for a decade or three, but when she came doon fae Scalpay, didn't she have a Rolls Royce engine? Aye Davie P, a Rolls Royce, and that's naw a wind up.

She did have a Rolls Royce engine, until it was replaced with a "pussy" in May of 1985.

And her first gross after getting re-engined was..........

[Bochan Mor]

Bubbly will need to watch out, now that the first case of bird flu has been confirmed in the UK. Somebody said that there had been a petition with 10,000 signitures came in along with this poor fella, demanding that no attempts were to be made to resusitate him. Poor brute!


Talking of birds, I heard this one the other day!

A Glesga Burd goes tae the social tae register fur child benefit. "How many children do you have?" asks the civil servant

"10" replies the girl.

"10??" says the civil servant.. "What are their names?"

"Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec, Alec and.....eh...Alec "Doesn't that get confusing?"

"Naw..." says the girl "its great because if thur oot playin in the street, ah jist huv tae shout ALEC, YER DINNER'S READY or
ALEC, GO TO BED NOW 'n' they aw dae it..."

"What if you want to speak to one individually?" says the perturbed civil servant.

"'at's easy," says the girl... "Ah just use thur surnames"


Edited by Admin!

[Bitter End]

Well well now its helluva quiet oan here the day! The J D hisna fund the boats! the Bochan is jist watchin fur the burd flu , Morenish is wurkin in the fields? Snoddy is contimplatin his navel!,(a most wunnerful thing!),Sanyanya is oot spredin kelp, Gary is wunnerin whither tae open a brewery ,an Ahm jist up tae pure boocherment!! Whit a wunnerful day wi the sun jist streamin doon,anTexas Boab aw them oors ahint! Ahl be awaw tae ma scratcher afore she awakes!

[Bitter End]

jist a we fitnote fur Gary the Goats eat seaweed! among jist aboot everythin else!

[morenish]

a bear, a lion, and a chicken meet.
the bear says when i raor the whole forest trembles!
the lion says when i roar in the desert, all animals cower in fear!
the chicken says thats nuthin, when i cough the whole world panics!

an yes i was in the fields, with all this good weather the dungs gettin wheeched oot tae the fields while it's still warm!

pure victory! i love the smell of slurry in the mornin!

beat that garry!

[GarySutherland]

jist a we fitnote fur Gary the Goats eat seaweed! among jist aboot everythin else!

Thanks, I wondered if that's what they were after. I know they graze sheep on the stuff out on the islands. Still, a comical sight.

Cheers
Gary

[Bitter End]

Pumpin slurry Morenish?-- Ah remember whin the boys walked ahint the trailer wi rakes an pulled the the stuff aff lettin it splatter thim frae heed tae toe ! Ah believe sum o it actually steyed on the grund! Smell o slurry in the mornin? ye jist stank o the stuff fur days!-the wurst thing ever tae wash oot o yer skin--didna metter hoo well ye covered up ,it alweys got ye!

[Hugs Thistles]

"Affa goody so" as my Buchan granny would say. So what's the point?

The point is that wirselves have deemed it good for a wee drappie into your friendly nearby metropolis for a whacko gig at the Royal Hotel onna 25th Merch. So? So, me der Kaister und das Joester is proposing to come in by the bothy that is the Glen on the Friday 24th fur a richt few pints to celebrate the proximity of Jack's ban, and play a few acooostic toons if yiz are game. Point is, there is no point other than we've naewherr to crash. Any floors or beds for one night only?

Yer new pal,
Hogs Thrushes

[Bitter End]

floors or beds for one night only?
Well HUGS efter 3 whole deys no wan reply, hospitality in the veelage is et a low --OR --wir aall mindin the lest time ye wir here ,the dancin wis niver better but the shenanigins efter wint doon intae the local folklore! Aye it wis the devils music richt enough!

[bubbly jock]

What's going on here then? It's like Southend on a non giro day. Lights on and nobody home jeest the net curtains twitching

Where is everybody I came in for a blether and nobody's in. I was away for a wee op and I jeest came in for a blether tae pass the time.

I won't say what the op. was but I'll leave a clue below. I don't think it was very successful. Might need to go back .

bubbly

[Bobbie En Tejas]

Bubbly, is that a newfangled hands-free walking cane for the blind?

Were you at a nudist beach? what??

Yes, everyone left! You weren't here, so what reason to live?? Good to see you back! Now stay!

[Frosty]

Bubbly ,
Would your Op have been funded by the NHS or was it a '' Private '' one?
Great to see you posting again.
Hope your recovery time is short.

fROSTY

[Bobbie En Tejas]

Ohhhh THAT kind of an operation! I thought you meant you were out on some top-secret assignment or something!

Okay, so I have the rare moment of slowness

I hope you are fine, bubbly! From the looks of that pic, they need to put in a spicket.

[bubbly jock]

Aye Bobbie

I used to jeest dangle it oot the window when I went out a run in the car, saved stopping for a wee pee Now they've cut that much off I need a length of hose to do the same trick

Och nothing stays the same sure it doesn't

bubbly

[Bobbie En Tejas]

....