Carradale

[Ticketty Boo!]

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/SEINN-THE-NATIONA ... dZViewItem

Includes Carradale Junior Choir. Now that's 38 years ago. One of the Trumpton water fairies would have been 12 yrs old then...............but could he sing?

[jdcarra]

Very hansome there, JD! Those don't look a'tall like wummin's claes to me

I, and thanks for the compliment Dorien , but that other rascal is fair stirrin me up. It wud soot him better tae get off his bl**dy computer and keep an eye on his train sevice. Manager of a rail service , ah wudna trust him wae ma wee Hornby which ah have had for some 43 years and still in wan piece. He's definitely going aff the rails.

And he knows damned fine a canna sing, unless he fills me wae some oh his local fire water A'll just hae tae hose him awa if he comes back at me wae any mere oh his b*ggerment. Am away tae prime the pump just incase .

[morenish]

well,well a record like that turning up in tynemouth of all places, i think that was the year bochan and i sang with lochs choir, pity it wasn't on video!

[ullean's mum]

hey jd, did they manage to get your brother in law into one of these skirts too,that i would like to see

[Bochan Mor]

well,well a record like that turning up in tynemouth of all places, i think that was the year bochan and i sang with lochs choir, pity it wasn't on video!

First of all: An Important announcement from the UK Dept of Transport.

There is concern over the current driving standards in England, so the
Department of Transport have devised a scheme to identify poor and
dangerous drivers.

This system will allow all road users to recognise the potentially
hazardous and dangerous ones, or those with limited driving skills.

From the middle of May 2006 all those drivers who are found to be a
potential hazard to all other road users will be issued with a white
flag, bearing a red cross.

This flag clearly indicates their inability to drive properly.

These flags must be clipped to a door of the car and be visible to all
other drivers and pedestrians.

Those drivers who have shown particularly poor driving skills will have
to display two flags:

One on each side of the car to indicate an even greater lack of skill
and limited driving intelligence.

Please circulate this to as many other motorists as you can, in order
that drivers and pedestrians will be aware of the meaning of these flags.

These flagged vehicles should be given an extra wide berth on single track roads.
If you meet one on the Leerside, then head for the hills.

Thank you for your co-operation.

Department of Transport

[Bochan Mor]

Boys-Oh-Dear, The grass has no chance of growing under our Morenish's feet. I couldn't believe my eyes; not only was there Morenish's farm and cottage, but now he has branched out wae a further business venture.

What I don't quite understand though, is why couples? Is there something that you would like to share with us Morenish? What ever you do, beware of clients in Kilts!



Are the **** stars for the level of accomodation or services rendered?

Anyway, it's long past when I need to get to the devil out of here, so I'll bid you good night.

[morenish]

thanks for the free advertising bochan, i was just relying on word of mouth before, must say it worked though,business is booming, i suppose it always does if you give good service and value for money.
please note the new rails and stob(well done mrs morenish!) no expense spared at my place!
i meant to get it put on the sign about kilts, and that B should maybe be a D, argyll signes are a wee bit lax when they see the grant money too quickly,however this venture compliments the wee chicken ranch i have shares in out in nevada.


thanks also for the timely warning about poor drivers and those flags, how long do they need to display them for?
do they have to resit a test or just get beaten?
i think though that people who display that lack of skill should just have thier licence taken away especially when the buses are free to folk of a certain age.
however it does seem cruel to have to display a flag just because of a wee lack of judgement on a hot day, 2 flags must be for a pretty serious offence.

[bubbly jock]

A wee ode tae a trumpton water fairy

The waving kilts the dress for me
Wae blades oh grass flying free
Jeest need tae watch where they go
Don't want them 'neath the plaidie oh

bubbly

[morenish]

aye sweltered seems it's not just me that has a gallows sense of humour, filched this from yahoo news:-

Katrina is a joke in New Orleans tourist trinkets
Reuters Sunday June 11, 05:33 PM

By Peter Henderson

NEW ORLEANS (Reuters) - Forget the jokes about getting drunk on Bourbon Street. The new New Orleans tourist T-shirts make Hurricane Katrina their own, with a dark humour that is selling briskly.

One asks, "got water?" in a riff on the popular "got milk?" advertising campaign. Another with a phony Red Cross image reads "Saving New Orleans, one drink at a time."

As the city faces a new hurricane season, T-shirts making light of the storm that put 80 percent of New Orleans under water

nine months ago have proliferated in the French Quarter. Vendors say they are outselling the typical tourist shirts, made for the New Orleans of another time, by a wide margin.

One of the best selling post-Katrina shirts, vendors say, makes fun of the looting that followed the storm: "I stayed in New Orleans for Katrina and all I got was this lousy T-shirt, a new Cadillac and a plasma TV."

i also hear the architect who was commisioned to re-build N.O. built a scale model in the sink

[Bobbie En Tejas]

Oh, Morenish, that last one was really bad! lol Yer gunna be in BIG trouble now!

[Sweltered]

aye sweltered seems it's not just me that has a gallows sense of humour, filched this from yahoo news:-

Katrina is a joke in New Orleans tourist trinkets
Reuters Sunday June 11, 05:33 PM

By Peter Henderson

NEW ORLEANS (Reuters) - Forget the jokes about getting drunk on Bourbon Street. The new New Orleans tourist T-shirts make Hurricane Katrina their own, with a dark humour that is selling briskly.

One asks, "got water?" in a riff on the popular "got milk?" advertising campaign. Another with a phony Red Cross image reads "Saving New Orleans, one drink at a time."

As the city faces a new hurricane season, T-shirts making light of the storm that put 80 percent of New Orleans under water

nine months ago have proliferated in the French Quarter. Vendors say they are outselling the typical tourist shirts, made for the New Orleans of another time, by a wide margin.

One of the best selling post-Katrina shirts, vendors say, makes fun of the looting that followed the storm: "I stayed in New Orleans for Katrina and all I got was this lousy T-shirt, a new Cadillac and a plasma TV."

i also hear the architect who was commisioned to re-build N.O. built a scale model in the sink

As you will note, these T shirts are being bought by people IN New Orleans. Not sitting 4500 miles away.

BTW the first storm of the year, Alberto is heading my way. Perhaps that little piece of info will alert you to why I don't find hurricane jokes funny.

[Bobbie En Tejas]

I have been watching that storm, Sweltered, and thought of you when I first heard which direction it was going. My daughter lived in Fort Walton Beach through three hurricanes and my son lives in Corpus Christi. You can bet that if I even suspect it might turn in that direction, I'll be speeding on down the highway to bring him back to San Antonio.

Be safe.

[Bochan Mor]

Well Morenish, what a week you've had. Just spotted in the Courier that you got a fine price for your beasts at Dalmally. £1.50 / kg indeed. You'll never be poor again. I passed Sanyanya at 'The Maiden's Plantin' this afternoon, leading that poor horse up the road at the end of a carrot. He had two things to say.

1. He was down whelking this afternoon and got a whiff of dirty scouders on the beach

2. He thought that he'd spotted Morenish swinging a scythe in a field of silage last week, whilst the others were harvesting with tractors etc. However, it turned out that he was only practicing thon Tai Chi.

I said that I'd heard that he's said to be perfecting the oriental art in an effort to aide his new found love of tantric sex. God help Mrs Morenish!!

[Right Pongal]

A wee ode tae a trumpton water fairy

The waving kilts the dress for me
Wae blades oh grass flying free
Jeest need tae watch where they go
Don't want them 'neath the plaidie oh

bubbly

A WORD OF WARNING REGARDING THE KILT!!!

The pleated cloth is dragging me down,
If my *rse had a face it would certainly frown.
The weight of the plaids might carry away,
But the Vaseline keeps the chaps at bay.

Swinging in the breeze like plums on a tree,
Any excuse to set myself free.
One too many and over I go,
toes in the air and its Ho Ho HO!

Up for the rolls at the crack of scorn,
She's making you wish that you had never been born.
A vodka Lucozade wae the heat of the oven
Bun sends you off with instructions to Govern.

Up the path wae a step that means business
She slaps you doon and the next thing its Christmas
Neerday looms and she hauls out your kilt.
You throw off the ropes and sing Eriskay Lilt.

Easter in the Minch and the days are fair stretchin,
The crew are scunnered wae months of wretchin.
We head for Crinan our clathes all in rags,
Not enough stoker to buy us some fags.

Should we tow down the sound and try make a pound,
or head for the Bay, where the red fish are found.
One thing's for sure, if there's nothing on the tables,
We may as well turn and head back for Mable's.

There's coal in the bunker and smoke from the lum
She appears at the door, looking incredibly glum,
Shaking her heid, she roars: 'Boys oh-dear, Not on yer Nelly'
You've drawn a blank and yer clathes are real smelly.

She lights a fierce fire at the back of the bunker,
All rendered to ashes, what an absolute gunker.
Dispatched to the shed wae a hunk of carbolic,
I just tried the kilt and .....Well.....Jeest remember Shambolic!

[Bochan Mor]

Pongal's dabbled in the elderflower wine,
have you ever seen him write so fine.
If he'd tossed the kilt and been suitably troosed,
His pride would be dented instead of thoroughly bruised!

Anally retentive most of his life,
the time has come to jetison that wife.
Time to throw the balls in the air,
make a break for freedom and the Tarbert Fair.