by Sheik Yir Erse » Fri Oct 08, 2010 12:44 am
Bob got to thinking, so he phoned the man from one of the largest companies in the land again.
- Hello there it's Bob from Corby again, remember me?"
- Certainly Bob, what can I do for you?
- Well I have a couple of additional questions you see, I hope you can enlighten me. Firstly, I've sat back and had a wee think about it, and although there will be 400ft mast in my front garden, it kind of pales into insignificance compared to the 8,000ft mast in the front garden at no. 36, or the 4,500ft mast in the garden at no. 18, or that new-fangled nuclear powered mast the lady at no. 54 has in her garden. So I'm getting more used to the idea. It really was only a matter of time before it got to my garden anyway. We've got to keep the Welsh happy haven't we. Everyone else seems to have put up with theirs for a long time (in fact, Mrs Jones has had hers since 1957) so I suppose I'll just need to take my turn like everyone else.
I was also thinking about these people you talk of in the Kingdom of Wales, the ones who will benefit from my phone mast, I assume they have phone masts there too, and they're land is full of them, much like ours?
- Ah, well not quite Bob, you see the people in the Kingdom of Wales aren't really that keen on phone masts, they don't want them there!
- So they don't use mobile phones?
- On the contrary, they love them, that's how their children are going to get those nice fast download speeds - from your mast.
- So there are no masts there at all?
- Well that's not strictly true, there's a 2ft high mast in the back of some Duke's garden. However the village Seer foresaw many terrible acts being visited upon the Kingdom, should a mast ever be erected. Plague, famine, pestilence and plummeting estate prices. It would bring desolation to the land if they were ever built. So they built the little one, and it provided coverage for 2 of the peasants (and obvioulsy a lot of money for the duke) Meanwhile back in Corby Kingdom your village continued to provide coverage for the rest of Wales, much like it has done for many, many years.
- So I assume all the horrible things actually happened after the little one was erected?
- Well, strangely, no.
- Ahh, well that's good. I imagine they built some more then, so they would no longer have to rely on Corby providing them with mobile phone coverage?
- Well, not exactly. They still don't want them. You see the strange thing is all the people of the Kingdom are "very much in favour" of mobile phone masts, just as long as they're somewhere else - like ye old village of Corby. In fact, and you're going to love this bit......if you're really lucky, your mast might even come from Wales, they build them there you see.
- Oh, so they build them and they send them here?
- Yes
- But they don't like them there?
- No
- So if I wanted someone to help me prevent it being built in my front garden, then I should speak to the good people of Wales for some help?
- Not exactly, this may be hard for your to get your head around, but the people of Wales don't really care about your front garden Bob. You're really meant to just continue providing mobile phone coverage to them for as long as they want. The interesting thing is, so many people now have to go and live in Wales (to build the masts to send here) that they'll soon need more mobile phone coverage for all these new people. So the great news for you is...... we'll be back soon to make your mast bigger. We can't hold back the quality of life in Wales you know.
- Wales seems to be the place to be then. One last question, do they have cake there?
- Indeed they do Bob, indeed they do.
Sheik Baby Sheik (_/_) (_\_) (_/_) (_\_) (_/_) (_\_)