Hopefully this post makes sense and everyone accepts it in the manner it is intended.
I work in Product Management for a Computer Software company. Essentially what the means is I'm responsible for delivering a product that our customers appreciate. These customers range from well known multi-nationals to slightly more obscure enterprises.
The product I deliver is like a member of my family. I'm very passionate about it, I help enhance it, I change it to meet new needs, I constantly listen to suggestions about it, and I think it's the best there is in the world.
However, it took me along time to stop being defensive about it. It's like someone criticising your child. Alot of time people have a genuine reason for complaining, however, they don't provide a solution all they have is a problem. From a Product Management perspective it is much easier if they have a solution, however, if they don't - coming up with the solution is my job! Even when they do come up with a solution, it's generally never thought through to the n'th degree. Again that's my job. You tend to get to the point where they say - "oh, I never thought about that aspect" quite quickly. At this point they leave the discussion, and you have to take it forward.
....... so what's your point caller?
Well, what I've learned, or had to quickly appreciate in this role is:
* Changing things takes a long time.
* No single person has all the answers, especially you
* Everyone has a valid opinion.
* Criticism is not to be taken personally.
* You will never have enough resource to do what everyone wants, therefore you have to keep plugging away at what you/they believe to be the most important issue.
* People have unrealistic expectations.
(don't think this is any different to any other area of work

)
Essentially I hear what everyone is saying - as soon as we realise that everyone has the same interest at heart, i.e. improving the forum, then we can begin to move forward. We're all passionate about it, we all want it to work, we all want it to be a success, we've all got loads of ideas, and finally we're all a bid defensive of it!
Davie - PM me if you think there are things I can do to help. I'll let you know how much time I can dedicate to the forum, and we'll take it from there.
Hope this makes sense - had a few bumper measures of the 'barley tea' tonight
