vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive.
"A less costly alternative," said the doctor, "is to go home, get a firework banger available from most east end corner shops all year round, put it in an empty beer can, light it then hold the can up to your ear and count to 10.
The Glesga Ned said to the doctor, "Ah might no be the smartest tool in the shed, but Ah cannae see how pittin a firework in a beer caun next to my ear is gonnae help me no tae huv ony mair weans."
"Trust me," said the doctor.
So the Ned went home, lit a banger and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count:
"1" "2" "3" "4" "5" ..... at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and resumed counting
on his other hand.
This procedure is available on the NHS, by the way, and works in Govan, Barrachnie, Garthamlock, Clydebank, Ibrox,
Parkhead, Caldercruix, Shettleston, Paisley, and Old Kilpatrick.
