Pub

[ionnsaigh]

Anybody fancy a pint in the White Hart next Saturday see FOD.

[Annie]

'll be there is spirit! One of my favorite places to go!!

[Friend of Dorothy]

Anybody fancy a pint in the White Hart next Saturday see FOD.

Just you get away and sort yer PC. Trojan horse........not very clever. Maybe you should read your manual and get some protection. Ya wee bam.
Anyway, I wont be in WH next saturday as i'm comin tae rob your hoose while yer in the Canaries

[Annie]

Now boys! Play nice!

[daftdog]

I wont be in WH next saturday as i'm comin tae rob your hoose while yer in the Canaries

Is it just one of the players or the whole squad??

[ionnsaigh]

Bona varda,
Standing outside my favourite pub, ( The Black Lung) having a drag with my dear old palone and a couple of friends ( omi-polones).
Two lilly palones mincing- troll towards us, orbs fixed- one on the palare pipe. WPC Jennifer Justice an Hilda Handcuffs -approached to polari.
Jennifer the butch one, her bijou bod, her ends tuck up neatly under her lilly capello. Hilda whore her oglefakes firmly on her onk. Large pair of willets.
I hope you girls dispose of your butts in bin. Cod- how naff I thought.
Peter the pan (bi the way) decided to scarper back into the Black Lung, not wishing to associate with omi - palones, this omi being a respectable member of the established community. Anyways the slapper smiled showing her pots. as they continued their troll.
A fantabulosa time had in Kintyre.

[ionnsaigh]

White Hart,
Decided on Sunday lunch, four of us. The bar was closed due to staff shortage we ended up in the lounge.
A drunken man rudely interrupted our conversation, asking why I spoke in an Irish accent, (I don't ).
The Three workers looked hard at work. Their is clear communication difficulties within the White Hart, particularly it seems from the kitchen.
As we studied the menu, we overheard two women who where having their meal, one asked for some gravy as her steak pie was dry. No came the reply from upstairs.
With special dietary requirements I knew beforehand that the menu offered little or nothing for me. However most places will divert.
I asked if I could get baked potato and beans. The bar person come waitress came out to the front door as we where having a fag. No sorry we don't have any beans. O.K. I then decided on a deep fried mushroom starter with dips -followed by southern fried potato skins as my main.
The starter was lovely no complaints. The waitress then said that the chef had decided to make me a baked potato with spicy beans. I decided not to voice my disbelief at the arrogance of the chef.
My particular order was last to arrive, personally delivered by the man himself asking who is the vegan, on seeing our two companions, he uttered och its only you two.
I mean one cant expect too much- however his untidy appearance- wearing a football top jeans and trainers hair untidy can only cast a blemish on the good reputation or otherwise of Kintyre, and the tourist industry.
Mick Donoghue.

[general jack o'niell]

so you enjoyed it then? last time i ate there, under the previous management i might add, i had a fish pie, which came in its own dish, with mashed potatoes on top, it smelt nice, so i tucked in, only to find that under the potato was a layerof clingfilm, being ordered to be on my best behaviour i said nothing, the pie was ok, not up to my own standards, but then what is?

good service is a thing of the past in this country and they wonder why we don't get any tourists?

as for the pint with FOD or dottie as i've now started calling him, been there, done that, not all its cracked up to be, that laugh does get annoying eventually, but then the bitchy gossip ofsets that, so count me in!!!!

i'll print his reply here to save time

"cheeky bastard!!!!"

[Friend of Dorothy]

Well General I do believe you almost paid me a compliment
I have nothing to add except my dear friend ionnsaigh still has a bit of work to do on his polari and even further to go before he becomes an honorary omee-palone. So heartface, nanti that meshigener auntie and turn my oyster up
PS. Never noticed Hilda Handcuffs, are you sure your ogle riders never clouded your vision?:oops:

[general jack o'niell]

you got that right droogie, almost!!!